The Courage to Let Go

I’ve always been a fixer.  If something is broken in a relationship I have with someone or if a friend is having a problem, I want to fix it.  I need to fix it.  Since I developed chronic pain and fibromyalgia, I have had to learn to let go of the things I can’t control.  It’s not my job to fix them, no matter how much I may want to.  I can help as I am able, but that’s all I’m responsible for.  Even at work, I’ll want to go above and beyond, to improve the quality of the product I put together as well as what others are working on.  I can’t do that any more.  I can still do good work without stressing about the small details no one will notice anyway.  And I certainly can’t fix the products others come up with.  That’s not my job either, even though a little voice inside my head tells me otherwise.  I’m still learning to ignore that little voice because what it’s whispering isn’t a healthy habit for me anymore.  It’s taken me a lot of strength and determination to change my ways and keep working to live my life in a healthier manner — both mentally and physically.  I work at this every day.  I guess my constant quest to not try to fix the things out of my control and to make myself healthier in mind, body and soul takes courage.  It’s definitely hard work.  But it’s worth it.  I slowly feel better as I release more burdens in my life and emotional baggage from my past.

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2 thoughts on “The Courage to Let Go

  1. Journaling Pain says:

    Wow. I am the same way. I want to fix whatever I think is broken. One thing I’ve had to remind myself over and over is that, not only am I not the One in control, but what I think is broken isn’t necessarily so. Hang in there! We’re traveling this part of the path together.

    • painfighter says:

      I remind myself of the exact some thing. I’ve done it enough now that I’m starting to notice a shift in how I think about things like this. I’ll take that as a sign of progress.

      I also feel like I’m traveling a path. I know I’m on the right path now I just don’t know where it leads. Its both enjoyable and scary that I don’t know where I’m headed.

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